Some conversations stay with you long after they end. My meeting with Rui Yu was one of them.

I went into the conversation expecting to learn more about her work in the mental health space. Instead, I walked away feeling unexpectedly emotional and reflective, as though the conversation had quietly uncovered parts of myself I usually avoid confronting. It was not just an exchange of ideas or experiences. It felt deeply personal, raw, and human.

Who is Quek Rui Yu? 

Quek Rui Yu (Wan Ting), one of our members in A Good Space, is an existential trauma therapist and mental health speaker.

Readiness Before Change 

What stood out to me was not just what she does, but the intentionality behind how she chooses to help people. Rui Yu shared that she does not try to help everyone. Instead, she works with people who are ready to look inward, people willing to confront difficult emotions rather than avoid them. At first, I found that idea difficult to fully understand. Part of me believed that helping someone meant staying no matter what, even if they were not ready to change. But the more we spoke, the more I realised that growth cannot be forced onto someone. Meaningful change only begins when a person is willing to face themselves honestly, and not everyone is ready for that kind of confrontation. 

The Questions We Usually Avoid

As the conversation deepened, it stopped feeling like a formal interview and started feeling deeply vulnerable. We found ourselves asking each other difficult questions, the kind people usually avoid because that requires honesty and emotional openness. There was a rawness to the conversation that caught me off guard. At certain moments, it felt less like I was simply listening to someone speak about mental health, and more like we were quietly unpacking pieces of ourselves together.

When Rui Yu shared parts of her personal journey and the losses she had experienced, I was struck not just by what she had gone through, but by the openness and emotional honesty she carried while speaking about it. There was something incredibly powerful about hearing someone speak so candidly about pain, healing, and rebuilding themselves afterwards. It made me reflect on my own experiences, moments where I, too, had to walk away from situations, people, or environments in order to protect my own peace, even when it was painful or difficult to do so.

I realised then how rare conversations like this actually are. Conversations where nothing needs to be polished or performative. Conversations where people are simply honest about what hurts, what lingers, and what they are still trying to heal from.

What We Carry With Us 

Another perspective she shared stayed with me long after our conversation ended. She spoke about how difficult experiences do not simply disappear when ignored. The emotions and unresolved issues we push aside often remain within us, eventually resurfacing in different ways – through our thoughts, behaviour, relationships, or even our physical wellbeing. Hearing that made me pause and reflect on how often we distract ourselves or convince ourselves that we are “fine,” when in reality, we are simply postponing what needs to be faced. Her perspective on healing reflects this deep connection between the mind and body, and it made me think about how much unresolved pain people quietly carry every day without even realising it.

Turning Wounds Into Purpose 

As we continued talking, Rui Yu also reflected on her own journey and how her past experiences ultimately shaped the work she does today. She recognised that what she had gone through could be transformed into something meaningful, something that could support others in their own healing journeys. That stayed with me because it reminded me that many changemakers do not simply choose their work. Often, their work grows from something deeply personal, from wounds, struggles, losses, or experiences that once changed them profoundly.

Looking Inward 

When the conversation ended, I did not walk away with neat answers or a clear conclusion. Instead, I left carrying a quiet heaviness alongside a strange sense of clarity. It felt as though the conversation had opened doors within me that I could no longer ignore.

What stayed with me most is this: change does not begin with what we do outwardly. It begins with what we are willing to confront within ourselves. Perhaps growth is not about having everything figured out, but about having the courage to sit honestly with ourselves, and begin looking inward even when it feels uncomfortable.

Sometimes, the hardest person to face is yourself.

To find out more about Rui Yu and her work, you can connect with her on LinkedIn: Rui Yu’s LinkedIn

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